Diclaimer: The Sisley Family are a completely normal mob from Orange NSW, Australia. they have nothing to do with peter Paul and Mary, and cannot imagine who could have hacked into this web page.
Here is a photo of the The Sisley Family in the Good Old Days when Alfonso had nightwork as a footpath scraper with Wrigley's recycling division.
Oh, they were snidger days!.
Our names (from left to right) are Clive the Reckless. He is an Aries. He broke his wrist playing indoor soccer, but this is an old photograph.Clive plays chess with strangers.
Then, Caro. If you look closely at her picture you can guess her starsign. Caro is keen on playing the trombone, but we do not let her.
The shrimp is Henry. He is a Cancer, or a crab. And it suits him. Mean, vicious, ill tempered. He plays guitar and likes Jimi Hendrix and Prodigy. At once. Masochists may click for more Henry.
Finally, Alfonso was born on the same day as Adolf Hitler and Margaret Thatcher- 14 August, and is similarly a Scorpio. He is slightly viler than Adolf, in that Alfonso's racism and contempt are not merely a means to a political end, but are genuinely held beliefs - the result of profound ignorance and stupidity. Alfonso embarrassed his monarchist uncle once in London by screaming at the Queen Mother "Get a Job you Despicable Drunken Bludger".
Alfonso once met Idi Amin and made a bad pun which did not amuse the dictator. Alfonso noted that Lake Victoria is the source of the Nile and that its shores are home to the Bugeesu and the Buganda people. He remarked "Well, it is true then - what is source for the Bugeesu is source for the Buganda".
As you can see, (if you are not choking on your own vomit) the The Sisley Family are the very models of a postmodernist nuclear family. Normal. Normal. Normal (we have to be, we must be normal). But Happy, Happy, Happy. Oh yes indeed.
ABOUT ORANGE
Orange is near Mount Canobolas. This promontory is the highest point between Sydney and India, but who cares less? Orange is very pleasant, and is famous for its apples, being too cold to grow citrus fruit. It was named by a Colonial period surveyor after his friend Prince William of Orange, who may have been, for all we know, a syphilitic moron.He had a job, the bastard, (if you can call an aristocrat employed).
Orange donated the gold, worth $200,000 to make the medals for the best drug cheats at the Filthy Lucre Olympic Games in Sydney 2000....although for all the thanks or acknowledgment Orange received they would have done better to have spent the dough on a beer and prawn night, or taken an ad in the middle of the 1500 metres freestyle saying "What kind of parent would want to turn their child into an outboard motor? Sick of someone else's fantasy? Come to Orange and get away from these mental midgets and their wretched obsessions".
Orange is inland, 260kms west of Sydney. This is good, we were quite a distance from the Games, and as all our electricity was siphoned into Sydney for the Games, we were blissfully unaware of any of the nonsense. The Olympic Torch (an invention of Joseph Goebbels and Leni Reifenstahl for the Berlin Olympics) did come through town, but it was so dark, that confused by the artificial blue glare of the gas torch light , 96 year old torch bearer Bernard Chomondley, 1926 Royal Tennis silver medallist, stumbled off an overpass and was gored fatally by a bull in a paddock below.
To be quite frank, Alfonso is the only member of the The Sisley Family who holds a particularly jaundiced view of the Olympics, and his position probably springs from envy. Alfonso is an Olympian himself, representing Tonga in the 1976 Games in Montreal, the ones with the odd mascot of cute Amik the beaver, who looked like a sperm cell emerging from an inkwell.
Alfonso competed in the 3000 metres hurdles, and despite winning a bronze medal did not earn a brass razoo...in fact he had to pay for himself, and was pleased to do so. In those days it was an honour to represent someone else's country, and you did it for love, not for fame or money or power or chicks, but because the King of Tonga promised you political asylum and a beach cabana.
Send us some e-mail, and we might send you some CampPie (extinct
Australian Spam)
